Handout 1: Vignettes
Vignette 1: What's the Trouble?
Gerard's teacher asked if we could talk. I said "Sure," but inside I was
nervous. I know that whenever a teacher wants to talk, there's usually trouble. She was nice, though. She offered me coffee, and then we talked about Gerard.
First off she said she's happy Gerard is in her class, and that he seemed happy, too. But after the screening, she did have some concerns. He seemed to fall down a lot, and sometimes he had trouble communicating what he needed. She thought getting him evaluated might be a good next step. Then she asked me what I thought.
Vignette 2: Waiting
Gerard's teacher said I should talk to the disabilities services manager (DSM).
She could explain more about evaluations and help me request one, if that's
what I wanted. For fifteen minutes, I waited while the DSM talked on the phone.
When she got off, she said, "I'm so sorry I can't talk now. Something urgent
has come up. Why don't you talk to Ruby and she'll set up another time for
us to meet." Ruby booked a time. Then she handed me a bunch of pamphlets.
One was called Helping Parents Cope When Their Child Has a Disability.
Who ever said I needed help coping? And who ever said Gerard had a disability?
Vignette 3: At the Playground
Gerard made mud cakes with some other kids. Then I saw Martha, whose daughter
goes to Head Start, too. She asked me how things were going. I was about to
say "Fine," but then I let it all out. At first I thought she might think
it was strange, like there was something wrong with Gerard or me. But she didn't. She said her daughter was evaluated last year and she got an IEP, and she's doing a lot better now. Before I left, Martha gave me her phone number and said I should call her whenever I wanted to talk, and maybe she could help.
Vignette 4: The Appointment
The school psychologist led Gerard into a little room with some toys. I started to follow them, but the psychologist said, "No, you need to wait out here,
Mom." When the tests were finally over, the psychologist asked me to come into
his office. Then he asked Gerard to wait out in the hallway. I should have said that Gerard shouldn't be out there by himself, but I didn't.
Vignette 5: More Testing
Gerard's teacher
asked me how things were going. I said all this testing was hard for Gerard, and for me, too. But we only had one more test to go. She asked if I
wanted her to come along. I almost hugged her.
Then I told her what Gerard had said about the psychologist. Gerard thought
that man was blind. Why else would he need Gerard to describe what was happening on all those picture cards? We had a good laugh.
Vignette 6: Getting Ready
I met with Gerard's teacher today. We talked mostly about the IEP meeting. She told me some things she's noticed about Gerard. Then she helped me think about what I wanted for Gerard, what I thought his strengths were, and where I felt he needed some help. It helped to talk, and I could tell she really listened.
Vignette 7: The Meeting
My husband and I met Gerard's teacher and the DSM at the IEP
meeting. I was really
nervous. But it was good to know that I wasn't alone. There were lots of people there:
the school psychologist who had tested Gerard, the special education director,
and the school principal. We all introduced ourselves at the beginning, then
people talked about Gerard. The DSM interrupted a lot at first, every time
someone used technical words. She'd say, "Excuse me, but could you explain
that term?" "What do you mean by that?" Eventually, people began to speak
in a language that we all could understand. And they asked me questions about
what I thought and what my concerns were. At the beginning I felt like an
outsider. By the end, I felt like I was part of the team.
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